Bodiccea (Chapter 13)

Template:Bodiccea nav Lut Gholein's sewers are infamous. They go very deep and extend out a long way, far under the bay and out beyond where the city walls should be. Rain comes infrequently, so the wastes tend to stay where they are until the annual rains wash everything out. One good side effect is that there is little of the mold and mildew that makes other sewers unhealthy places, but the air is still foul and rank. Vermin of all kinds find a safe, cool home down there, even in the good times; in bad times, you can find much worse things than rats. There are two easily accessible entrances: a maintenance hatch in the upper city near the gates, and the main exit above the bay.

"Okay," Bodiccea said, wrinkling her nose. "There's three levels. Radamant the evil sewer mummy is on the deepest one, like always. We go through each level, clearing everything, and don't go down to the next until we're sure it's empty."

"Like usual," Heather nodded.

"Yeah. Now, Radamant is a big mummy, and they resurrect any undead they can see. He comes with a whole bunch of skellie mages and other guys, so when we figure out where he is, start luring followers away and killing them out of his sight."

"Just like with Shamans."

"Yep! The monsters are mostly fire skeletons, but there's always some others. Ok?"

"Sounds like usual," Heather smiled. "Um, what about... what we talked about?"

"Huh? When was this?"

"Just a few minutes ago. Since I'm kind of having a hard time getting any experience, I was wondering if, maybe, you could, um..."

"Oh, yeah, slow down a little. How about this: I stand in front of you and draw all the fire. You plink away, I don't hit anything. Leave the potions for me. Except Radamant: we have to kill him fast so he doesn't raise too many skellies. Ok?"

"All right."

Not far from the entrance, they found Burning Dead archers, the first of many, no doubt. As agreed, Bodiccea moved out in front and stood there while Heather killed them. Her fire resistance was good, so the arrows didn't hurt much; a light healing cured all the burns. The next fight wasn't so good -- they didn't drop any healing potions, and Bodiccea was starting to get bored.

"Could you, like, speed it up a little? It's getting toasty up here."

"Sorry, I'm going as fast as I can!"

A Sand Raider approached. Bodiccea dodged another arrow, fidgeted in indecision, then ran up to the Raider and stabbed it with Bloodthief.

"Hey!" Heather said, running up. "You said you --"

"It's ok! I didn't kill it, I just wanted some hit points."

"Oh," Heather said, killing the Raider. "I guess it's ok if you do that."

Bodiccea grinned. "I can do that." Using Bloodthief, she went around the hall, Jabbing each skeleton and Raider once. A few died, but not many. Heather got most of them.

"Why are you using that spear?" she asked when it was done.

"Less damage, more leeching. How you doing on leveling?"

"Better, thanks. Think we can clear the level like this?"

"Sure."

Further on, they found some Dried Corpses, little mummies Bodiccea could leech from. She had to chide Heather for going through a corpse-gas cloud more than once.

"Heather, you gotta stop doing that. That stuff is murder on your lungs."

"Yeah, I know, I just keep walking into them."

"You walked all the way across the room to walk into that one!"

"I know... I couldn't help it. It was like some kind of compulsion."

"Look, if you like stinky smells, try sniffing one of those grates in floor. There's enough poo gas down there for anybody."

Heather laughed a little. "Sorry."

Because there were so many undead, Bodiccea put a couple of Eld runes in a long bow and gave that to Heather. The clear went a lot more quickly after that. The second level was even better for undead -- almost all Burning Dead and Burning Dead archers, with enough Sand Raiders to provide leeching. The sewer waypoint was near the stairs... convenient, if illogical. They found several charms of greed (man, are they common) and a suit of cheap chainmail.

"What are you going to do with that?" Heather asked.

"Sell it. Even crappy armor is worth money."

"I was wondering if you might have a bikini made out of it."

"Heather! I can NOT believe you'd think I'd do that. No, wait, I can see why you'd think that. Maybe..." Bodiccea paused for a moment, considering. "It is hot out..."

"I was kidding," Heather said, starting to look alarmed.

"Ok, ok," Bodiccea laughed. "It's too stereotypical anyway. Say, how do you think they justify all these Sand Raiders being down here, anyway? If Greiz's mercs are guarding the walls, how'd all these guys get in here?"

"Um... maybe they snuck in while Radamant was roaming the streets at night?"

Bodiccea laughed. "Makes as much sense as anything else."

"Like having three levels of sewers under a city in the desert?"

"Sure! Why not put a waypoint down there too? Horadrim mages love sewers."

By the time they got to the third level, Heather was 15th level, and Bodiccea 20th. Bodiccea started doing more of her own killing now. There were plenty of Burning Dead archers and Sand Raiders, but also Huntresses. Kitty girls, and bare-breasted too. "Tell me Bliz doesn't know its audience," Bodiccea thought. One Huntress was lightning enchanted, but Bodiccea Impaled her with Bloodthief and actually healed from it.

They found all kinds of strange equipment in the sewers: crystal swords, spiked shields, and some interesting light armors, but nothing either of them could really use. Heather was still getting most of the kills, and was learning to ignore her strange obsession with corpse gas. Up at Fara's, Bodiccea tried on some splint armor, and liked the look so much she immediately went out to check on the strength requirements for russet armor. Not out of reach... and the mule had a suit with three sockets. If only they had the runes for Lionheart...

Soon after finding a Shimmering Grand Charm of Inertia (wow, something vaguely useful) they found Radamant, wandering around in the least accessible corner of the level. Bodiccea switched to the fiery spear and ran right in.

"I thought we were going to lure the minions away," Heather said as she ran in after her.

"I got bored," Bodiccea replied, found Radamant, and backed him into a corner, jabbing her little heart out. Heather sighed and went to work on the dozen or so mages blasting away at them. Eventually, Radamant collapsed like a sack of wet groceries. Bodiccea checked the room for loot while Heather got the kills. "Here we go."

"What's that?"

"The real reason for doing the Radamant quest: the Book o' Skillz. How they justify giving Radamant a book that has useful info for anyone who happens to kill him, I don't know. Oh, and a Horadric scroll. Hmm... give this to the Cain in Lut Gholein. Why does it say that?"

Heather shrugged. "Because that's where he is right now?"

"I dunno. Weird. Anyhoo, that's it for the sewers. Let's see how you're doing. 'O'!"

"Not too bad," Heather said, looking over her stats. "I'm more than halfway to level 16."

"Cool, you might make 18th by the time we're done with the Stony Tomb. For sure you'll be up and going for the Halls of the Dead, that's where things start getting dangerous."

"What's in there?"

"Dozens of mummies like Radamant, and more lesser undead than you can shake a stick at. Let's go out in the morning, I'm tired of being a pincushion right now."

"Ok. Um, you want to keep doing this until I'm 18th level?"

"Well, sure," Bodiccea nodded. "I don't want to leave you behind, girl. Once we get you a nice gemmed bow, you'll be doing ok."

"Ok. What kind of gems do you think it'll have: fire, cold, or lightning?"

"Probably all three. Anyway, let's get out of here."

Back at Atma's tavern, Atma expressed her undying gratitude for Bodiccea's daring deeds. It wound up meaning discount rates from the local merchants, not free beer. "Damn. A beer would be good right now."

"So buy one," Heather said.

Bodiccea tsked, and shook her head. "Heather! I am a hot blonde babe in a bar. I should NOT have to pay for my own drinks! Sometimes, I think you don't understand anything at all. It's like you've been living in a monastery or something."

"Um, yeah." After looking around, Heather pointed out Geglash. "Maybe that guy will buy you a beer."

With a laugh, Bodiccea sat down on a bar stool, one leg crossed over the other. "How about it, sailor? Buy a girl a drink?"

"Huh?" Geglash looked around. "Are you talking to me? Lady, I'm no sailor! I don't even like to drink water!"

"See? Nobody even notices me," Bodiccea pouted theatrically. "I guess no one here is MAN enough to be interested in one deprived... restless... LONELY Amazon. Fine! I'll pay for my own drink, and go to bed. ALONE."

"There is one thing..." Atma said from behind the bar.

"My drinks are free?" Bodiccea grinned.

"No. I must ask you to put out your spear, it's about to set the ceiling on fire."

"Well, phoo. I suppose I shouldn't expect a party: there's only 5 people here, and most of them are already out of it. I'll just go to bed. 'Night, Heather."

As she left, the group collapsed on the tavern's long table looked up. "Heather!" Khaleel said. "C'mon over."

"Hi, guys," Heather smiled. "How's it going?"

Kasim shrugged. "Same old, same old."

Paige: "Things working out any better?"

"Um, kind of. We went through the sewers. For most of it, she was actually pretty cool. I thought she wouldn't let me kill anything 'cause she wouldn't want to give up the spotlight, but she just stood there and took all those arrows for me."

"Weird," Kasim said. "My boss always made me tank."

"She surrendered glory to you," Kasim shrugged. "She must hold you in some esteem."

"Well, she did ignore our plan and take down Radamant by herself."

Kasim chuckled. "Nice little drama queen act here in the bar, too."

Paige: (rolls eyes) "You noticed that, huh?"

"Hard not to," Khaleel said. "But everything about her is hard not to notice. So, tomorrow it's out to the Rocky Wastes. Got any plans?"

"Yeah. She's going to keep letting me make kills until I'm 18th level."

Paige: "Oh, good. I think I see a 6-socket bow with perfect gems in your future."

"Yeah! Is that good?"

Khaleel smiled. "I'm not much for weapons, but with one of those, you sure won't have to worry about falling behind. Most likely, you'll have a new problem with her."

"Like what?"

Khaleel grinned. "Jealousy."

"Oh," Heather nodded. "Really?"

Paige: "I think so too."

Slowly, Heather started to smile. "Ok, I'll want to see that."